I know numerous people who have questioned whether they should continue living after they tested positive for hsv - including me. I knew I would never really end my life, and at the same time, I also felt deeply that there was nothing good left for me. Sitting where I am now, I can see with clarity that the little voice that said, "keep going," knew better.
The news of the suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain is truly saddening. Celebrities, public influencers, high achievers -- humans. Because they are in the public eye and are people of influence, we forget that they are human beings just like us. When talking to people about hsv, I often remind them that every single person has something that they're hiding, or that troubles them deeply - stds, mental health, sexual abuse, financial debt, the list goes on - every person has something that makes them feel completely alone. Fighting the shame of it all, alone.
But you are not alone.
We think, "how could someone with such success still want to end their life?" The truth that I've experienced is that it's not about how successful you are, or how much money you have, it's about how open you are with your pain - it's your self-awareness, your desire to find understanding and clarity, your willingness to seek help.
If you've had the thought, "if someone of their stature could commit suicide, where does that leave me?" remember that you are not them. There's so much we don't know about either of them - so much that we will never know. We all have our own stories and all we can focus on is us.
Share your story. Look for people who might be going through the same thing. Talk to a therapist. Reach out to suicide prevention resources. The more you share, the more you'll learn for certain that you are not alone.
That voice inside that says, "I do not want my life to end this way." Listen to it. Give it a microphone. Follow it to healing.